Sunday, July 13, 2008

The Pizza Box Dilemma.

Odd name for a blog, yes? The story:

My girlfriend is out of town tonight, won't be back until tomorrow. Any man knows that this is the perfect time for something special:

Inviting over the other girlfriend.

Unfortunately, the other girlfriend couldn't make it. That meant it was the perfect time for another special event:

Ordering pizza.

I quickly pulled out the PayPal debit card and hit the website for Domino's Pizza. (As far as I know, they're the only ones who deliver in my ghetto neighborhood. The delivery people call me and ask me to come to the door when they arrive.) I checked the website's listing for online coupons, and lo and behold, there was a beauty: three medium, one-topping pizzas for $5.55 each. (. . . Or close to it. A few drinks in, remember?) I quickly ordered the holy triumvirate: Italian sausage, pepperoni, and bacon.

I could talk about pizza all night. It was delicious. However, the only ones consuming these three pizzas were your humble auteur and a four-year-old girl. There was a lot of pizza left over. THERE, dear readers, is where we run into the Pizza Box Dilemma:

How the heck am I going to fit three pizza boxes into the fridge?
Hard Mode: You're terrible at 3D spatial reasoning.
NIGHTMARE MODE: You've had a few vodka crans before the attempt.

Surprisingly (. . . to myself), I made it happen. The finished result involved several drink bottles ON THEIR SIDES. That's creative thinking for you.

The Pizza Box Dilemma was solved without heartache or bloodshed . . . this time.

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